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Questions to Ask at Your Child's Therapy Evaluation
What to ask about goals, approach, home practice and progress - and how to tell a specific answer from an evasive one.
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An evaluation is a two-way conversation, and the questions you ask shape the plan that comes out of it. The most useful ones are about goals: what are we working toward, who chose it, and what will it look like in daily life when it is working. Goals written in clinical terms, such as improve gross motor skills or increase expressive language, are harder to measure and harder to care about than goals written as things your child will be able to do. Asking for the second kind is reasonable, and a good therapist will welcome it.
Why the questions matter
An evaluation is a two-way conversation, though it rarely feels like one. A clinician has an hour, a form to complete, and a child who may be doing very little of what they do at home. What you say in that hour shapes the plan that comes out of it, and what you ask shapes it just as much.
The most useful questions are about goals, because a goal is the thing everything else follows from. A goal written in clinical language - improve gross motor skills, increase expressive language - is hard to measure, hard to work on at home, and hard to care about. The same goal written as something your child will be able to do is none of those things. Asking for the second kind is entirely reasonable, and a good therapist will be pleased to be asked.
Questions about goals
- What are the goals, and who chose them?
- What will this look like in daily life when it is working?
- Are the goals written as things my child will be able to do, or as clinical measures?
- How long do you expect this to take, and what would change that?
- What would you tell me if progress stalled?
“Improve gross motor skills” is not a goal. “Climbs stairs with alternating feet” is. Goals in daily-life terms are easier to measure and easier to care about.
Questions about approach
- What approach do you use, and what is it based on?
- Is reducing stimming or increasing eye contact among the goals? If so, why?
- How do you respond when my child says no?
- Do you consider changing the environment before changing my child?
- Can I observe sessions?
- What training do you have in this specific area?
Questions about what happens at home
- What should I be doing between sessions, specifically?
- How much time should that take?
- What if I cannot manage that some weeks?
- Will you show me, and watch me do it?
Questions about progress
- How will we know this is working?
- By when should I expect to see a change?
- What would make you change the plan?
- When would you discharge us, and what happens after?
What a good answer sounds like
A good answer is specific. It names a behavior, a setting, or a time frame rather than a category. It is put in daily-life terms - what your child will do, where, and with whom - instead of in the vocabulary of the profession. It is honest about uncertainty, because a clinician who has met your child once genuinely does not know yet, and saying so is a better sign than a confident number. And it welcomes the question. You are the person who will do the work between sessions; a therapist who wants that to go well wants you asking.
Two answers worth following up on
“We are working on sensory integration”, with no explanation of what that means for your child in particular. It may be an entirely sound plan, badly explained under time pressure. Ask what it will look like in practice, and what you would notice at home if it were working.
“Every child is different” used to avoid giving any timeline at all. It is true, and it is also the most common way of not answering. Ask instead what would be a reasonable point to review whether this is working.
And a third, which matters more than either: a goal you did not choose and do not recognize as important. Goals get carried over from templates and from other children. Say so, and ask for it to be rewritten around something you would actually be glad to see.
Frequently asked questions
Is it rude to ask a therapist what their training is?
No, and it is asked far less often than it should be. Pediatric therapy covers a wide range and clinicians specialize; asking what training someone has in the specific area your child needs is ordinary professional practice, not a challenge to their competence.
Can I bring this list into the room?
Yes. Print it, put a tick beside the ones that matter to you, and write the answers down while you are there. Nobody remembers an hour of conversation accurately afterward, and taking notes signals that you intend to follow the plan.
What if I disagree with a goal?
Say so at the time, and ask for it to be reworded rather than removed. A goal you did not choose and cannot see the point of is unlikely to be worked on at home, which is where most of the change happens. Goals are meant to be agreed, not issued.
How many questions should I actually ask?
Three or four that genuinely matter to you beats working through a whole list. The ones about daily life - what will this look like when it is working - tend to produce the most useful answers, because they force the abstract into the concrete.
Should both parents come?
If you can, yes, and if you cannot, ask whether the session can be recorded or summarized in writing. Two people hear different halves of the same conversation, and the one who was not there ends up with the version that was remembered rather than the one that was said.
What if the answers worry me?
Ask a follow-up before deciding anything. Plenty of clinicians explain badly under time pressure and well when asked again. If a second attempt is still vague, or a goal you objected to stays in the plan unchanged, that is information worth acting on.
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